Here's a thought: Get this Billingham insert and stick into any bag of your choice:
http://www.billingham.co.uk/acatalog/Accessories.html (bottom of page)
This is kind of what I do, I have many camera bags, none perfect by any means.
With current restrictions on size and weight of carry on bag for air travel, I quite often take as large a carry on bag as I can, so that I can pack all the camera gear and those multitude of accessories you need, chargers, leads, adaptors, blowers, cloths, hard drives, etc.
Then when I get to the destination I need a smaller day bag for carrying just the camera and a couple of lenses, spare batteries, cards, blower, lens cloth and space for some documents, wallet, maybe phone, sunscreen, water.
So, I bought a small messenger type bag, which was a fraction of the price of anything sold that is sold as specifically for camera gear (like 10% of the price), it doesn't look like I am carrying $$$ of gear. Inside I have a base from a Billingham bag (it was far too bulky and awkward to open, extremely poor design, but I was given it for free), and some Billingham inserts. I also put the Billingham clip-on shoulder pad on the shoulder strap of my messenger bag.
So my advice, mix and match, that way you get what you want and it doesn't look like a camera bag (if that is what you want).
This bag takes up very little space in my suitcase when I travel, indeed it gets packed with other items inside the suitcase.