...On the other hand, for some people, anything in black & white, regardless of tone, might seem contrived & retro (somewhat related to that, I've had someone tell me that a perfectly ordinary-looking black & white image was "cool because it looks so retro"; I certainly wasn't thinking "retro" when I made the conversion, which was not sepia or even particularly grainy!)
a lot of people thing my work is "retro" precisely because most of it is black and white. i'd go even further and say a lot of mine can be considered "stylized" as well since i push the contrast and sharpen, which often pulls the grain out (rather that hide or subdue it). i often work an image for the texture of a picture, not just shapes and tones. i work it to my aesthetic.
that said, it is clearly not everybody's cup of tea and i occasionally get criticized for over-sharpening (whilst i, personally, love the bite). funnily enough, however, when i try to subdue this tendency and present a more "realistic" picture, i usually get called to task from those who like my usual way of working -- i.e., where's the contrast? where's the grain? etc.
so all my work *is* stylized to some extent, but it is part of the voice of the images. my voice, my aesthetic... i'm sure some would call it kitschy or gimmicky but i could frankly give a rat's ass about that. like i said: my voice, my aesthetic.
as to the rag on selective colour -- phooey!!! i probably use it more than most, but it is always a colour that existed in the original -- never added. if i keep it in, it is to make a point -- usually humorous or ironic. on one of my more successful images, i kept it in merely because it was so stunning in real life and the geometry of it worked. in all cases the colour adds to the pictures. does the selective colour make them stylized? hell, yes! but i also feel there wasn't a picture without the colour. that, i think, is the key to when to use it.
desaturation can be looked at the same way. some people like colour, some don't. i'm one of those who doesn't particularly love it (i'm talking street shots here), especially when the image is strong enough to sing out in black and white. but sometimes a picture needs some colour to add texture, mood, etc. i personally like desaturating the colour in those cases as i feel that it allows colour to add rather than distract from the intent of the image.
all these thoughts are subjective, though. they are mine. they may or may not be yours. one of the joys of this forum is we all have very distinctive looks and likes, and aren't afraid to voice them....
BTW, Ellemand, thank you for letting me stay (even if it was just to keep your crush, Lili, happy:ROTFL